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The ‘Real’ ‘Man’


Creative Commons License This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Author : Prerna Jain

This article intends to portray that  “a real man treats his lady the same way he wants another man to treat his daughter.”

Any fool can be a Father, but it takes a real man to be a Daddy!! – Philip Whitmore Snr

Men are the best cooks. Because with two eggs, one sausage, & a little bit of milk he can fill a girls stomach for nine months. – Sandra B

‘Boys’ and ‘men’ differ in terms of their matureness and character. When I say that ‘a man should be real’, I intend to imply that he should be respectful to a ‘lady’. Now, it will be a completely different story, if we are going to discuss matureness and etiquettes of a ‘girl’ and a ‘lady’ here. Lets just focus on “real men” or “gentleman”.

The principal official language of the Republic of India is Standard Hindi. And, in Hindi, when we call a man “namard” [lesser man] or “napunsak” [neuter / impotent] or “hijray” [eunuch], it implicates that he is a male “biologically”, but, is an anti-man either by temperament, or, more likely by conditioning (in ‘literal’ or in ‘figurative’ sense). He behaves in a disrespectful and an ungrateful fashion. He is hostile, aweless and disrespectful of women. He has no understanding and appreciation of woman or womanhood. He just enjoys his social power (of being a “man”/manhood) and thinks that he possess nerves of steel and muscles of iron.

Unfortunately, this kind of namard includes most of  men.

They have no backbone. These men lack courage, courtesy, chivalry. They are highly insecure, chauvinist pigs. Their mind setup states that physical strength (masculine power) is all that matters. This is the root of penury in their hearts. Hence, we witness so many incidences and court-cases of rapes, domestic violence, dowry victims, parda-pratha, sati-pratha (practice), non-acceptance of widow-remarriage, polygamy, prostitution, etc.

……Even the littlest things matter….“Ladies first” is not said just like that . It is profound. It has a significance. It has a meaning.

Not treating women as sex-objects or as punch-bags is what really counts.

But, Now, Here’s the interesting part…

When you call a “literate” man  a “lesser-man”, he would immediately reply ” Oh , Yeah, how dare you say that, I am pretty potent and can stuff any girl for 9 months”. End of story. Now, what more do you expect from such ‘uneducated literates’… In fact, some even have audacity to retort “are you a real lady”? “Why am I only suppose to be responsible. Oh,  Dont you have any duties to follow, and laws to abide”?

 If another girl steals your man, there’s no better revenge than letting her keep him. Real men can’t be stolen.Real men stay faithful. They don’t have time to look for other women because they’re too busy looking for new ways to love their own.

This society is made by men , for men, and also ruled by men……

If you dress sexy, you’re a slut. If you argue with him, you’re hard-headed. If you’re quiet, you don’t care. If you call him, you’re too clingy. If he calls you, he says you should be happy. If you don’t love him, he’ll think you are “playing” hard to get. When you do love him, he leaves. If you don’t f**k him, you’re a tease. If you do, you’re easy. You tell him your problems, he says you’re irritating. If you don’t, he says you don’t trust him. If you lecture him, you just wanna argue. If he lectures you, it’s cuz he “cares”. If you break a promise, he doesn’t trust you anymore. If he breaks it, it’s cuz he had to. If you cheat, he expects it to be over. If he cheats, he wants another chance.

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